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It's not racism... it's race-based misandry

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  • It's not racism... it's race-based misandry

    Here is something I had noticed my entire life, wherever I go strangers find me intimidating, it always bothered me but no-one around me was honest as to why people were that way to me until one day a friend told me that people had bad ideas about black men (I was still a teenager back then) and I knew that generally speaking a lot of white women in my country would be afraid of me, thankfully this mentality is quite rare in my country and I didn't notice it really until I visited my U.S. American cousin in New York City and I noticed that some Korean store owners would follow me around while I was in their stores (this isn't much different from how it is in the Netherlands, just a lot more common), and every now and then some non-Hispanic white woman would grab her purse, but other than that these things were quite rare, Americans think more about race than Dutch people but it wasn't that common, going to my Latin-American ancestral homeland I noticed that Chinese store-owners always had bars between them and their costumers, this was to ''keep the criminals out'', though a Chinese store-owner did grab my wallet out of my hands and store some Euro's and American Dollars I had in my wallet, to this day wherever I go I generally tend to be nice Chinese people but I've never met one in Latin-America, there was this prejudice against us Africans.

    But still all of these above were isolated incidents and though I've been threatened in my life for ''looking creepy'' and ''scaring women'' a handful of times in the Netherlands, I never noticed much racism (that wasn't intended to be a joke) in my life until I went to Asia, in the Philippines I would be charged twice as much (but this was because all non-American foreigners are seen as bad there) but still if we had to pay the jeepney driver people would pass the money to the front and it would pass my hands as much as that of the natives, other than the usual Asian mantra of ''foreigners pay more'' there really wasn't much I had bad dealing with until... I went to Hanoi.

    Suddenly wherever I went women would grab their purses while standing next to me or walking towards me, I faced a combination of laughter (taunting) and fear, though generally wherever I went people thought that I was either Arab or ''white'' (which is another way of saying ''non-Asian''), but for some reason there was one neighbourhood in Hanoi where people recognised that I was an African and I noticed that when I entered a man holding a few hundred thousand Dongs suddenly hid them from my sight the moment I simply looked up but didn't seem to do this with others and he firmly stared at me, so I stared back and after I was more than 10 meters away from him he walked with it openly again, later a guy shouted ''marijuana'' at me, which I thought was funny because I'm Dutch and we consider it one of our ''fun stereotypes'', and generally in the West I noticed that if I'd walked with a female people would suddenly be ''less scared'' of me, if I walk anywhere with either my mother, my sister, or an aunt I've never really seen a woman grab her purse (though that could still change every day).

    In Viet-Nam I was in a gated community for the rich (as my wife is quite rich) and even there the same mentality exists, I was walking with my wife and passed a group of young women, around 6 or 7 women and 3 men, as I passed by I was walking hand-in-hand with my wife and suddenly every woman grabbed her purse fiercely, when I talked about this with another man of African descent and he noted that himself too and said that he ''just ignores it'', and his friend overhearing us agreed. When I later asked the same of a Black woman she laughed at the idea of people hiding their belongings from her, then I realised that these ideas are very specific, they only affect black men, the friend who pointed this out to me said it was because I was a black boy, but how people viewed me had nothing to do with racism and all with sexism, just like that the more ''radical'' version of this idea is not ''just'' that ''all black men are potential thieves, rapists, murderers'' but ''all men''.

    Don't get me wrong, nowhere in the Western world does institutionalised racism against non-Europeans exist, in fact I'd say that being of European descent is a problem, as a child I faced little racism because I had a white father (blue eyes and all) and people just assumed that I was ''a darker white person'' and the only other black kid in school was bullied for ''being a Papua(n)'' and I was among the group mocking him (something I deeply regret, though thankfully we did end on a friendly note, the kid was Congolese), my father faced racism, he was put behind non-whites (regardless of sex) and white women when finding both an apartment (or housing in general) and employment by our government (there's a reason why most homeless people are white males), whenever I hear the word ''racism'' I always look at the victims (receivers) of it and rarely have they been female, and if female it's usually ''racism'' in jest (for example being called ''Black Pete'', a Dutch tradition around Sinterklaas where people paint themselves black) and that's usually benevolent and gender-neutral, racial stereotyping against Asians is usually bad for the men as the only negative stereotype I can find about any race tends to be against the males:

    Blackmensteal, rape, murder, are criminals.
    Asianmen have a small ''member''.

    And generally speaking the stereotypes that belittle people tend to be against men, ''men are simple'', ''men are unclean'', ''men are dumb'', ''men are unimportant'', Etc. Etc. Etc. while the positives tend to be for females with a few exceptions (think ''women are emotional'' but that one is usually complimented by ''women win every argument'', and some might say that ''women are complicated'' is negative towards women, but it usually translates as ''women have complex well-thought out lives that require a lot of higher brain-functions while men are basically 100% their reptilian brain'', or others indicate of their control over men like ''women are impossible to deal with relationships'' mean ''men are responsible for everything, and constantly have to cater to their female partners''.)

    The term ''racism'' often blinds people to what most prejudices really are, just ''race-based acts of misandry''.

  • #2
    I think you got a point here... indeed it is race-based misandry